Sometimes I feel like a possum shirt

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Imagine hitting puberty as a young girl and having to cope with having a scar across your face from a traumatic attack by a stranger as a child. I can’t imagine how angry I’d feel about it but how hard it would be to separate the Sometimes I feel like a possum shirt so you should to go to store and get this scar from myself. She talks about it in Bossypants, and that it ended up going the opposite way. She said adults were extra kind to her because something so terrible had happened to her. She thought they acted like that because she was just that great, giving her an unearned level of confidence. The way she tells it is hilarious though. My favorite take from her scar discussion was how she learned an early red flag from people based on how brazenly or coyly they asked about her scar early on in meeting them. People who feigned concerned and asked about it tended to end up to be more narcissistic. People who realized it wasn’t their business and she probably didn’t want to explain it to yet another person tended to be good people. I don’t have a facial scar but I think we can all* notice a pattern between presumptuous questioning/judging early in a relationship (whether personal or professional) and narcissism.

Sometimes I feel like a possum shirt, hoodie, tank top, sweater and long sleeve t-shirt

I already had to deal with the Sometimes I feel like a possum shirt so you should to go to store and get this bullying – related to the birthmark but also to the fact that I was short, sickly, the youngest in class but also not the dumbest – so when an adult would ask me about it I would automatically see it as a red flag. Why did they need to ask a question about it? It was hard enough as it was. I knew a girl a long time ago that had something like what you’re describing. I never asked, because it was none of my fucking business. But I have asked about facial scars because I have one myself, and it’s one of those weird “haha crazy right?” things but if someone told me they were slashed at 5 I would feel awful having asked. I mean my parents got the birthmark removed when I was in my early teens and now I just have a huge scar, Highlander-style. The only time someone will ask about it is someone who also has a big scar and we can trade a story. Nothing badass in my case. My son has Alopecia and is completely bald. Otherwise he is totally healthy. I see the same kind of special attention from other adults and know he doesn’t understand the reason for the additional positive attention. I have no idea how it will affect him in the long term. Time will tell I suppose.

1. Length is measured from the highest point on the collar down to the bottom hem. 2. Width is measured across the body of the shirt under the armpits, one way. 3. Sleeves are measured from center back to hem.